Yesterday I buried a friend. Today I saw a man who was broken, wretched, confused and reeking of insanitary hells and death, who had been thrown out of a car outside the meeting. I feel intensely moved to write about recovery, in the hope that someone somewhere may find some small hope or inspiration in these words. Continue reading On Recovery – Hope and Inspiration
The first step on the path to recovery is to see and accept that there is a problem. For most of us, despite our best efforts to avoid this truth and deny the problem, it is pretty obvious. We know some people can drink and use until dead, but to even consider recovery we have come to realise that there is something badly wrong with our ‘habit.’
We have come to a place in life which is difficult, lonely, and full of fear. We are often depressed, anxious, and full of self hatred and self pity. We have probably suffered great losses due to our ‘problem,’ including relationships, jobs, health, wealth, and certainly our happiness. Continue reading Step One – Surrender and Acceptance
This song of pith instructions was transmitted from master to disciple through the ages, and as I was watching I felt quite inspired and excited so I thought I would share it. I hope you enjoy – I listened to it with my own soundtrack though!
If you would like to read more translations of this song I found this website which seems to have a wonderful selection. The joys and good fortune of the internet age!
I’m becoming fascinated with dreamwork again, and am appreciating what they can teach us, both in a single dream and in the course of their evolution over time. This is but an introduction to how to work with your dreams, and I look forward to writing more as I learn more about this fascinating topic and practice. I would really welcome any discussion or insights into this work, or any suggestions for further reading or how to more effectively understand the life of dreams. Continue reading The Teachings of Dreams – Introduction
Every now and again, you turn inwards, and see that mind can be free from its usual patterns, of its cravings and selfing and delusions, delusions like separation, fixity and permanence.
When it happens, it is like becoming aware of a great sun, and you feel as though you know that this is how mind can be, this is your potential. There is the sense that no object is to be found or craved, no subject to find or do the craving, and that this beautiful light is the light in and of all beings, in and of all life.
Never again would there be the sense that I can be seen as separate to you, or to other, or to all. It can be less like seeing a sun and more like becoming sunshine, boundless, edgeless, free, and bright.
Experience surrounded by echoes of bliss and beauty and excitement, and the deepest peace. You wonder if you will ever be the same again, and of course, knowing you are not fixed, you know you won’t!
Beyond any kind of thought or feeling, perception dies away, and you know that if you could just stay in touch with this dimension of being then all craving and suffering would simply fall away.
You also know that if you could show others how to find it, suffering would cease in them too, and perhaps you might just hope that with the dawning of this light, any conflict or harm, any greed or pollution or power becomes obsolete, not sought, its true nature seen and understood.
How can you fight or use another if you know you are not separate, and understand that like you, they seek happiness and an end to suffering. How can you possibly destroy the environment which holds this field of life, how can you possibly not act for the benefit of all life?
Change often manifests as crisis, we lose a life we have constructed, we are stripped of who we were, the person who has this or that job, this or that relationship, and lives in this or that place. There is a golden opportunity and a power available to us during times of transition or crisis, to open to the great mystery and find new meaning and new possibilities.
I write this, and decide to break a long silence. I had a copyright claim against me, and a divorce to cope with, so despite writing at length of pain, and of ways to cope with pain, I have felt unable to publish this yet. I have written much for people in recovery which I will post soon, and have more recently been exploring shamanism and druidry, and a living connection with nature which is inspiring me beautifully.
I don’t see this as separate or different from buddhism, the buddha having lived in connection with the natural world and its spirits and beings. I started to write about the way in which nature can sometimes seem to communicate with us, teach us, connect us with our wild nature, but this article evolved into something else.
There is a fulcrum in the process of perception which is a delusion, and from that delusion follow craving, attachment and aversion, and therefore suffering. This fulcrum is an assumption under which we labour, which is a false assumption, and if we can manage to turn that fulcrum upside down, or rather, set it back up the right way, then the way in which we relate to the world, things, people, events, the senses and the emotions is changed and gone is the majority of our suffering.
The delusion is this. We are brought up to think that we are a separate and independent being, and as a result of that, everything that is not a part of that being is other, and is a threat or something to be desired. We have consciousness, in which are various arisings, and because we see we assume a see-er, because we think we assume a thinker, because we feel we assume a self that feels. It is a catastrophic fault of vision, to assume this self. We see this self as being evident as a separate body, an independent mind, perhaps even a soul. Continue reading The Fault in our Vision which Might End Human Existence
I made a big mistake with this blog, in thinking that because it was not for profit and for educational purposes I could use various photographs I found online. I recently discovered that this is not the case, and can only apologise for any harm done. I genuinely wanted to offer spiritual wisdom and inspiration for those who are interested or suffering, and wanted to make the site visually stunning in order to do so. It is so hard to remove such beauty from my site, but I will try to buy or license some of those I really love.
If anyone reading this has taken beautiful pictures and would consider letting me use them then please do send me images and any credit you would like. I am tempted to launch a photo competition but I fear I don’t have enough readers! Any beautiful scenery or nature, Buddhas, light, sunshine, skies, are the kind of images I love to use.
Sadly I might have to pay a considerable sum in damages, which will effectively put me out of business. In the meantime, and in the hope that the photographer concerned will not pursue me for money I do not have, I am going to go through the 108 articles I have published, and the 70 or so more in the editing process, and take out all photos apart from those I have paid for or taken myself. For a perfectionist like me this is hell, as I really took my time to find perfect images which complemented my writing and communicated what I could not. I hope the site can still maintain the beauty I strove for with less professional images.
I do apologise for the site being offline, and the slow process of putting it back together in a way that is ethically more sound, and I apologise to those whose pictures I loved and wanted to use. I do hope that there will be no more lawsuits, and aspire to ensure everything I used is with permission.
This does give me a chance to go through and edit all my old articles, so perhaps it is a blessing in disguise, as I dread to think what I wrote when I began this project a few years ago! So thank you for bearing with me, and do please feel free to donate if you find the site useful or have benefitted from the recordings I have offered, I would be very grateful for any generosity in return.
To understand the significance of the Buddhas, it may be worth reading the introduction to the mandala of the five Buddhas, which explains a little more about what they really are and how they evolved in the archetypal Vajrayana Buddhist imagination. Effectively how real they are, and in what way they are real, is left to you. They are not like Gods, they represent aspects of the enlightened mind, and as such, are both real and unreal, both archetype and other power.
Ratnasambhava is the gorgeous bright Buddha of the southern realm, made of golden light, made of the summer, of generosity and abundance, giving and equanimity. He is the sunshine at its bright zenith, the reworking of the mind and heart to include all life in one’s outlook rather than the limited one self. Continue reading Ratnasambhava – The Golden Buddha of the South